Thursday, August 27, 2009

The Day I Lost My Faith in Humanity, Volume XXI

You know that house on your block?

The one with windows shuttered by overgrown shrubs and an ill-kempt lawn where the weeds are only outnumbered by creepy lawn ornaments?

The one that never has any lights on?

Yeah, well... people keep telling you a lady lives there by herself, but you never see her.

One time, though, you thought you saw a floral-patterned moo-moo moving in the faint, flickering light produced by the Home Shopping Network. But nothing conclusive. Kinda like that grainy film clip of Bigfoot.

OK. Say someone does live there. What on earth does she do inside that house all day?

Answer:

3 comments:

  1. Anonymous2:14 PM

    is it just me, or does this seem like something a serial killer would do? is the purchase of this book alone enough to arrest someone?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think it would depend on the breed of dog. Some dogs have really long, luxurious coats. I bet a large, long-haired dog could be shorn at least once a year. With this book, you are ready for the craft fair circuit.

    ReplyDelete
  3. See, this is a perfect example

    From Amazon Comments:

    "My only complaint is the cover is misleading, there is a picture of a basset hound on the cover but you can't spin basset fur. I own a basset and bought the book because of the cover."

    Remember that when you're at the shelter…you can't spin basset fur!

    ReplyDelete