What it is, Bs & Gs? Let's have some fun - with MARTINIS!
Here's what we'll do, I'll go mix up a knockout and you do the same.
After we're done with #1, we'll reconvene and comment on recent events.
What fucking fun! Let's not waste time. Let's shake it up!
Martini #1 Consumed
Ya-ha. 1st one's in the books. Let's take a look at some current events, shall we?
We motherfucking shall... Fuck... Ass...
Website for martini uno is USA Today. Let's see.
Holy fucking nightmare.
Seeing your parents in wax sucks ass. This is not firsthand knowledge - this is
instinctual knowledge, derived from various shitty horror movies circa 1975-present.
No matter how much you'd like to see your paraffin parents - abstain! They will come to life, perhaps not in really-real life, but at least in your head. In defense of ownership, your real parents will have to fight your wax parents, and then who do you root for? Wax parents?
Come to think of things, they could be super chill and zero maintenance from a geriatric standpoint. "I checked my parents into a home. So sad. How are your parents doing?" "Fucking fine, so long as they're kept away from open flames."
Eugene's thirsty! Battle stations, cohorts.
Martini #2 Consumed
Bah-kay... psshhoo... Let's do this. How 'bout People?
Oh... This shit is too easy.
Kim Kardashisomething is drinking what now? Unlikely. This sounds like a martini that's coated with nonsense. Methinks Kim Kar-etc... is in really-real life drinking a martini, like myself. She's a sensible media creation. She needs the pure... Moving on.
Rhianna is drinking tequila. Rhianna should be drinking tequila. Why did Hitler drink tequila? It made him mean. Kudos Rhianna. Destroy Chris Brown with your drunken anger. Nest? I actually typed "nest" instead of next. Honest Intrigue... Next?
Jennifer Love Hewitt. Her drink is fucking boring... Next. (though check out One Block Radius' track "I Like Him", which features a lyric pertaining to JLH)
So Hangover big dick and Keanu Reevers like Black Mojitos? Damn it, children. This drink, allbeit assuredly delicious, is fucking stupid. It only contains 2 oz of fun. Do a g.d. shot.
That's it. This was fun. I'm out. Remember, things that interest you should be big-ups virile and...
INTRIGUING!!!
Here's what we'll do, I'll go mix up a knockout and you do the same.
After we're done with #1, we'll reconvene and comment on recent events.
What fucking fun! Let's not waste time. Let's shake it up!
Martini #1 Consumed
Ya-ha. 1st one's in the books. Let's take a look at some current events, shall we?
We motherfucking shall... Fuck... Ass...
Website for martini uno is USA Today. Let's see.
Holy fucking nightmare.
Seeing your parents in wax sucks ass. This is not firsthand knowledge - this is
instinctual knowledge, derived from various shitty horror movies circa 1975-present.
No matter how much you'd like to see your paraffin parents - abstain! They will come to life, perhaps not in really-real life, but at least in your head. In defense of ownership, your real parents will have to fight your wax parents, and then who do you root for? Wax parents?
Come to think of things, they could be super chill and zero maintenance from a geriatric standpoint. "I checked my parents into a home. So sad. How are your parents doing?" "Fucking fine, so long as they're kept away from open flames."
Eugene's thirsty! Battle stations, cohorts.
Martini #2 Consumed
Bah-kay... psshhoo... Let's do this. How 'bout People?
Oh... This shit is too easy.
Kim Kardashisomething is drinking what now? Unlikely. This sounds like a martini that's coated with nonsense. Methinks Kim Kar-etc... is in really-real life drinking a martini, like myself. She's a sensible media creation. She needs the pure... Moving on.
Rhianna is drinking tequila. Rhianna should be drinking tequila. Why did Hitler drink tequila? It made him mean. Kudos Rhianna. Destroy Chris Brown with your drunken anger. Nest? I actually typed "nest" instead of next. Honest Intrigue... Next?
Jennifer Love Hewitt. Her drink is fucking boring... Next. (though check out One Block Radius' track "I Like Him", which features a lyric pertaining to JLH)
So Hangover big dick and Keanu Reevers like Black Mojitos? Damn it, children. This drink, allbeit assuredly delicious, is fucking stupid. It only contains 2 oz of fun. Do a g.d. shot.
That's it. This was fun. I'm out. Remember, things that interest you should be big-ups virile and...
INTRIGUING!!!
Posts
3 comments:
you're like a drunken superhero clown on justice league probation.
don't ever change,
blaine
xo?xo?xo?xo?
x= hugs
o= kisses
?= wildcard!
Watch it, Gene. Once, the "wildcard" was a turkey sandwich. The second time, it was a reacharound.
I haven't been brave enough to try for a third.
So everyone at the Diary makes me laugh, but "bits" aren't really the thing here.
Until now. Pure Eu-genius.
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