Originally posted 2/2/09When: Last week
Where: Walgreen's
What: The At-Home Paternity Test i.e. The Maury Povich Show: Home Edition
And the good news is, simply by purchasing your At-Home Paternity Test, you've already taken and failed the "Does This Kid Stand A Fucking Chance?" Test, so you won't have to worry about that.
"See, Suzy, the smiley face means I have no daughter. So, tell your mom I took off, will ya? Oh - And I'll be back for the dog. What? Oh come on, don't look so sad, Suzy... I'll see you again in about 15 years when I unknowingly accept a lap dance from you."
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7 comments:
Ever notice how "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" results in whoops, jumping around, and cheering about 10 or 15 times as often as it does tears?
Let that be a lesson, peeps. Kids are the ultimate sexually-transmitted disease. Wear a condom.
I have referred to kids as STD's for ever now and everyone gives me this disgusted look when I say it!
hehehe... seriously, why anybody would get upset about you comparing their child to an oozing genital sore is BEYOND me, lucy.
I'm picking two of these up on the way home!
Condoms suck. I just choose women who will let me dun a wet-vac up there after im done.
Sure it ends up weeding a few out, but thats probably for the better.
you disturb me, taj. seriously.
Of all the things said, you draw the line at sperm hoovering?
Strange man, Fridley.
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