Week in Review, 11/1/09

You Stay Classy, Philly

The Curious Case of J.J.

At some point in our lives, we have all been there. We've all been confronted with random acts of ignorance or stupidity. Be it the jerk that cuts us off in traffic, the cashier who can't count quite fast enough, or the idiot blaring unbelievably loud metal music from his headphones in a public place, you have, at some point in your life, encountered a situation that made you pause and rethink your moral opinion on the use of violence as a means of expression. As rational human beings, we are quickly able to catch ourselves before our inner Charles Manson is unleashed. But there is that moment, before you come to your senses, where you stop and think "I swear, if I had a gun..."

Enter James Joseph Cialella, of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. While attending a Christmas night viewing of 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button', J.J. became irritated by a family of incessant noisemakers. Thoroughly disturbed that his Brad Pitt fix was being interrupted, J.J. implored the family to cease its clamor. His polite request was rebuffed and J.J. retaliated by tossing popcorn at a young son in the family. Finding that this was not a sufficient outlet for his troubles, Mr. Cialella rose from his seat and approached the family. As J.J. neared, the father of this rambunctious family rose from his own seat and was subsequently greeted by a shot in the arm from J.J.'s .380-caliber handgun.

Now it's up to you to decide how you feel about this story. You may call J.J. a monster, a lunatic, a sociopath. You may feel that his actions were unwarranted and unnecessary. But if you dig deep a bit deeper you will realize that there is a bit of J.J. lurking within us all. And then, perhaps, you will call him a hero.

And really, shouldn't we turn our attention to the real question - Why was a 29 year-old man alone watching 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button' on Christmas night? That, my dear friends, is the true crime.

I Salute you Philly

Vice-presidential candidate and self-proclaimed hockey mom Sarah Palin spent this past Saturday at a Philadelphia Flyers’ game to drop the ceremonial first puck. Philly fans are known to be the most brutal in the nation and they basically tore Palin a new one. To be fair, as the video goes on the initial onslaught of the very audible boos just sort of turns into a mash up of random noise. My favorite are the people giving the thumbs down sign in the background.

I must say that I am happy that Philly fans are obnoxious a-holes. Not only do I enjoy a good boo-ing and other generally obnoxious sports fan behavior, but most other places would have given her the obligatory golf clap and moved on. So, I salute you Philadelphia for always letting your true feelings be known, and for doing so in a rude manner.