Famous Last Words, Part IV

Famous postwar novelist (and noted recluse) J.D. Salinger died on Wednesday. In other words, you're STILL not gonna get that fucking interview.

In part four of our ongoing series (click for parts one, two, and three), the Diary of Fools brings you the "Deathstyles of the Rich and Famous."



"I feel great. Why do you ask?" - Actress Brittany Murphy

"If you don't know me by now...? Well, frankly, you're sort of out of time." - Soul Singer Teddy Pendergrass

"If Eddie Murphy comes anywhere NEAR the service, just shoot him in the goddamned face. Yes, immediately." - "Gumby" Creator Art Clokey

"The next person who cracks wise about 'The Big Bonanza in the Sky' is fucking coming with me." - Actor Pernell Roberts

"Yeah, okay, fine...Love means never having to say you're sorry. But being as I might not have a lot of time left, I'm gonna start apologizing for some shit if that's okay with everyone." - "Love Story" Author Erich Segal

"Colon cancer. Figures. Jesus...even THIS has to turn out to be ironic." - Misfits Drummer Brian Damage

"What?!? SALINGER just died? Well, that's just fucking GREAT. Man, if I needed any MORE incentive to hang on an extra couple of days, I...I - Oh, God...[*wheeze*]" - Author/Historian Howard Zinn