Hello, Friends.

A heartfelt, groin-grabbing “thank you” and “welcome back” to the Diary of Fools. We're happy to have you. Please, relax and make yourselves comfortable. Go'head and take your pants off. We're cool with that here.

For you first time visitors of the Diary of Fools, allow me to explain it thusly: an interweb account of all things ridiculous in this exercise of cluelessness we call “life”.

Yes, when it comes down to it, we’re all pretty clueless… just, definitely some more so than others. And it is that certain percentage of the population which the DoF makes our focus and upon which an entire blogosphere was built and continues to thrive today, really.

Why?

Because nothing helps us cope with the cluelessness better than knowing we're not the MOST clueless.

You'll find an abundance of Kim Kardashian posts here for a reason.

OK, bad example. Those posts are labeled under "boobies", "ass that won't quit" and "shameless link baiting" more so than "schadenfreude".

But, whatever, you get the idea.

Whenever a "simple-minded, backwoods jackhole of a human being" encourages racism as the "moral" thing to do, we'll be there.

Whenever a major news outlet touts itself as a trustworthy, vital information source and then follows it up with an in-depth report on cankles, we'll be there.

Whenever a newborn baby is fitted for a toupee, we'll be there.

And as long as Anne Coulter… well, continues to exist, we'll be there… to call her a cunt. (Sorry, ladies. A horrible, ugly word, we know. But when you think of a more applicable usage, please do let us know.)

This is our vow to you, the less clueless DoF reader.

Stop in daily, comment often and share us with the ones you love.

And seriously, go'head and take your pants off.

XOXOXOXO

The DoF Crew.