What do you say when someone sends you this email?

by barry metropolis

The following email was received by a friend of mine from one of his colleagues. He asked me, "What do you say when someone sends you this email?" Needless to say, I didn't know what to tell him.

Friends,

Below is a letter published in the Richmond Times Dispatch, July 7, 2008, by a former Cuban refugee. (Check it out on their website.) This can be fodder for you to persuade those who are unhappy with our current administration to think twice about voting for Barak Hussein Obama for President. History repeats itself.

Beware Charismatic Men Who Preach 'Change'

Editor, Times-Dispatch:

Each year I get to celebrate Independence Day twice. On June 30 I celebrate my independence day and on July 4 I celebrate America's. This year is special, because it marks the 40th anniversary of my independence.

On June 30, 1968, I escaped Communist Cuba and a few months later I was in the United States to stay. That I happened to arrive in Richmond on Thanksgiving Day is just part of the story, but I digress.

I've thought a lot about the anniversary this year. The election-year rhetoric has made me think a lot about Cuba and what transpired there. In the late 1950s, most Cubans thought Cuba needed a change, and they were right. So when a young leader came along, every Cuban was at least receptive.

When the young leader spoke eloquently and passionately and denounced the old system, the press fell in love with him. They never questioned who his friends were or what he really believed in. When he said he would help the farmers and the poor and bring free medical care and education to all, everyone followed. When he said he would bring justice and equality to all, everyone said "Praise the Lord." And when the young leader said, "I will be for change and I'll bring you change," everyone yelled, "Viva Fidel!"

But nobody asked about the change, so by the time the executioner's guns went silent the people's guns had been taken away. By the time everyone was equal, they were equally poor, hungry, and oppressed. By the time everyone received their free education it was worth nothing. By the time the press noticed, it was too late, because they were now working for him. By the time the change was finally implemented Cuba had been knocked down a couple of notches to Third-World status. By the time the change was over more than a million people had taken to boats, rafts, and inner tubes. You can call those who made it ashore anywhere else in the world the most fortunate Cubans. And now I'm back to the beginning of my story.

Luckily, we would never fall in America for a young leader who promised change without asking, what change? How will you carry it out? What will it cost America?

Would we?

Manuel Alvarez Jr. Sandy Hook.


Hoooh-kay, so, where to begin? First of all, no one cares that you celebrate Independence Day twice, you crap sandwich.

More importantly, how Mr. Alvarez can link these "similarities" to eventual doom for America is unfathomable. I mean, I know he may not have been around this country for 9th grade civics, but we have these three branches of government, a system of checks and balances, and ....uhhh.... what's that last thing? Oh yeah, the goddamn U.S. Constitution. However much abuse, misuse, and sheer ignorance is thrown around Washington and the rest of the country, I still go to bed every night feeling certain that my country will be a representative democracy when I wake up.

After perusing the Richmond Times-Dispatch (actual name of the paper) for a while--mostly the Letters to the Editor section--I realized where all these out-of-touch voters who elect retarded men are coming from. Seriously, put down the Busch Heavy and the Copenhagen Fine Cut and read a newspaper. Our country relies on a well-informed citizenry to function properly. No wonder we're all floating on urinal cake right now.

Mr. Alvarez doesn't piss me off the most, though. He was just voicing his worries because some fear-mongering Virginian legislator is probably whispering those sweet nothings into his ear, so we can't expect him to know any better (even though he should). No, the big asshole in this whole equation is my buddy's colleague. Talk about an awkward position to put everyone on your mass-email list in. Have some fucking consideration! And invoking "Hussein"? What's in a name anyway, you rabble-rousing son of a bitch? Are you going to start hatin' on Muhammad Ali for having an Islamic name? Or are you going to stop bringing your car to Timmy's Tire and Lube because Timothy McVeigh shares the same name? Give me a break...

But if Mr. Alvarez is right... if Barack Obama is elected to our nation's highest power... if he does turn into an oppressive, cigar-puffing dictator... I know where I'm going: