Thursday, October 22, 2009

Close, but missing 8lbs of human pushed out an orifice

Diary of Fools is about to get Mommified, most likely to the utter horror of the other contributors. (HAHA!) But, I can't help but share this ridonkulously awesome video. Some brave (mentally unstable?) Aussie doctor decided he should figure out if men could handle the pain of childbirth.



To almost no mother's surprise, he cannot. And it's laughable that he only makes it, what, 2 hours? And that's with the aid of laughing gas - which, WTF? Laughing gas?? I mean, that's kind of like putting a band-aid on amputated arm. The smirk on the woman's face when Dr. Manpussy decides to give up is worth the entire 10 minute watch alone.

8 comments:

Lucy Parker said...

I was wondering, if you know you want to have a c-section, can they do anything to prevent the natural widening of the vagina?

Didi Pantz said...

Oh dear, don't get me started on knife-happy OBs and being "too posh to push." This being a blog where things are (supposed to be) funny, I'll leave it at this: Babies, however uncomfortable, are meant to come out of the vagina. Surgery is great for removing tumors and transplanting organs. And the OCCASIONAL surgical extraction of a baby if someone's life is in danger. Otherwise, just roll with an epidural if you're worried about pain. As for your vagina, just do your kegels.

Frank White said...

Everybody out before their menstrual cycles synchronize! It increases their demonic power.

Didi Pantz said...

this sausage party needed to be broken up.

Katherine said...

Remind me to never get knocked up.

1) because as I've mentioned before, I like my vagina.
2)because fucking ouch. Vaginal tears? Using a spray bottle after you pee for a week after giving birth? A child sucking on my teet?

All of this sounds horrible. I will be purchasing a child (or possibly be trading in an ipod for one), thank you very much.

Frank White said...

Yeah, I read about 'fistula' once and had to assume the fetal position in the shower for a couple of hours to try and wash the knowledge from my brain.

John Marshall said...

i refuse to stand idly by and allow this mockery of an experiment to go unbashed -

1. uterine muscles are not abdominal muscles. i'm guessing that since uterine muscles are created for the purposes of the birthing process they're built to handle the experience a bit more.
2. the "brave" woman who volunteered to test the simulator asked them to stop after about 10 seconds. wimp.
3. there is a completely different set of responses an individual would have if he/she was actually pushing out their baby as opposed to just being hooked up to a bunch of electrodes.

i could go one, but why? travesshamockery. that's what this is. i've survived the morning after eating at an all-you-can-eat mexican cuisine buffet; i'm quite convinced i could push out triplets at the very least.

Tajmccall said...

i have child bearing hips. I could take that shit. Easy.

Meaning your pussies are pussys.