by Reno Gruber, lover of humans, liker of animalsYou can't fucking make this shit up people.
First. Go here (link below) Read the comments. (As many as you can before getting really angry.) Then come back.
http://www.asylum.com/2009/03/13/man-wrestles-and-kills-giant-shark/
Not that Reno should be surprised that there are fucking morons out there, but the depth people have fallen into the abyss of logic is so profound it makes him fearful he will one day bring another soul onto this earth that must navigate through crazy of this level.
Let's do a quick inventory.
Man is in ocean. Is attacked. Has legendary 2 hour battle to heroically save himself and friend. Cat People from the dankest corner of the internet are outraged a defenseless shark was "murdered."
If Reno reads about an animal being "murdered" ever again, he may begin destroying people. Animals are destroyed, people are murdered. Of course stupidity of this level actually makes me root for natural selection.
Congratulations PeTA. You have taken a noble cause like being decent to defenseless animals, and through your tireless crusades into things that barely mattered have carved out a niche of fucking morons that care more for a killing machine than their fellow humans.
God/Allah/Xenu/Spaghetti monster have mercy on our souls.
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3 comments:
Look, I'm sorry. I understand that all creatures of heaven and earth are precious and all that navel-gazing, Kum-Bay-Yah bullshit. But I don't give a tenth of a shit if you're a card-carrying chapter president of the Kitten-Kissers Klub...If there's a half-ton eating machine that's coming at you like a freight train, licking what passes for its lips, all with a little visible thought-bubble of a Crown Roast of Human floating above its head? Animal lover or not, I promise you that you are going to end that motherfucker's life or die trying. Because I guarantee you he's got the exact same thought bouncin' around the lump of cartilage in his skull.
However, if any PeTA members are interested, I'd welcome their decision to go swimming with the sharkies, then simply lie back and succumb to gettin' et should that be the Will of Nature. Because we could use a lot fewer of them around.
That is, except for the hot naked ones who paint themselves and hang out in cages, and shit. Because that's pretty fucking hot.
Agreed. Hot N' Sexy, Merton.
So if a shark eats a human it is a tragedy, and if a human wrestles a shark to death over the course of a 2 hour grudge match (despite the notable handicap of merely having a snorkel at his disposal and thus having to hold his breath for 115 minutes past the typical threshold of brain death via asphyxiation) then my question to you is this: who has the moral highground in the famous battle between a shark and a waterlogged zombie in Zombi 2?
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